Reprinted from the Herald, 24 April 2006

The bedroom baby
The problem
Sally, 12, had been sleeping on a sofa-bed in her parents' bedroom in their house in Livingston for six months. When her father, David, and mother, Susan, tried to make her sleep in her own room, she became hysterical and the whole family had a poor night's sleep.

The parent doctor's plan
"This was a psychologist's dream," says Dr Woolfson. "Thirty years of experience told me I could hit it on the head immediately." He asked David and Susan to explain to Sally that she would no longer be sleeping in their room; to remove the sofa-bed; and to buy Sally a brand new bed of her own, as she had previously been using her brother's old one.

They had to make it clear that the new set-up was non-negotiable. If Sally woke up, she would be allowed to keep on her lamp - but under no circumstances could she go to her parents' room. If she did, she would immediately be sent back.

So what happened?
"We anticipated it would be very difficult," says David. "Sally knew we were going to see Richard, and why. We saw him on a Wednesday and decided to begin the process on the Saturday, but we were apprehensive about what we were gomg to see."
When Saturday came, David bought Sally a new bed and took the sofa-bed to the dump. "There was no going back, and that was the message we gave," he says.

They went to bed expecting a night of tears and tantrums. "But, to our amazement, it was fine," says David. "She woke up a few times on the first night but, as Richard suggested, we didn't confront her. We said, 'We understand, and you'll get through it, but you will sleep in your bedroom,' and she seemed to accept that quite readily. By the end of the week it was like there'd never been a problem. She woke up during the night but there were no histrionics. After a few days she put her light on but wouldn't disturb us. We'd been braced for all sorts of things but none of it transpired."

The parent doctor's conclusion
"Before, David and Susan thought this was a deep-rooted problem that they would have to confront one day, and they just couldn't face it," says Dr Woolfson. "Four weeks in, Sally would wake up and put her light on, but there was no calling out.
"She knew they were coming to see me, so she knew they needed help. They shared the problem. The parents are lovely, and are taking pride in their achievement even if Sally isn't buying me any presents.

What the parents think
"I asked Richard why he thought it was as easy as it was," says David.
"Perhaps it was simply because Sally knew we were going to see him - and because, when we came back, we told her in a calm manner what would happen. Getting the new bed and getting rid of the sofa-bed reinforced that. Perhaps all these things put the message across.
It hasn't been mentioned since. It's as if it never happened. As far as we're concerned, it's in the past It was just part of her growing up."

Dr Woolfson's key tip
"It's common for parents to know what they need to do but not feel able to do it. After someone helps them change the situation, their perspective changes. They can't believe they left it so long."